


The Christmas Levi Bagged His White Elephant

by DarkCyradis



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Eruri Secret Santa, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Romance, eruri - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-08 04:07:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5482712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkCyradis/pseuds/DarkCyradis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At the Survey Corps's annual White Elephant Gift Exchange, Levi makes it a point to walk away with Erwin's gift every year. But this year, Erwin's choice of gift leaves Levi with a dilemma on his hands--and perhaps the opportunity to admit the feelings he's harbored for his commander for years. Holiday fluff + Eruri Secret Santa 2015 gift fic!</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Christmas Levi Bagged His White Elephant

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AbbyS686](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbbyS686/gifts).



> Eruri Secret Santa 2015 Gift Fic for Abbys686 / Attack-On-Steven-Universe! ^__^ 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this fluffy, little holiday fic of our favorite, adorkable, old men love birds! <3

It was a bad idea and Levi knew it, but he really, truly could not help himself. For all the things he was strong for throughout the year, for all the little things he never granted himself—this was the one thing, at this one time of year, that he would earnestly, honestly, greedily indulge in: he would have Erwin’s White Elephant Gift at the annual Survey Corps holiday party, and come hell or high water, _nothing_ would stand in his way.

The problem was, this year, the thing standing in his way was Erwin himself—or, to be more precise, it was the nature of Erwin’s White Elephant Gift. While the Commander’s tasteful, generous, and universally useful or covetable choice of gift was always highly sought-after at the gift hunt, be it due to dread or respect, none ever dared to steal the gift away from Captain Levi once it was in his possession.

This year, however, after Petra (the third gift-opener) had managed to dig up the Commander’s neatly wrapped present from the bottom of the unopened gift pile and torn it open, Levi perceived that indulging in his annual treat might be somewhat problematic this year.

Because—while every year prior to this that Levi could recall Erwin’s gift (that is—every year since his clever subconscious had acknowledged he was falling irredeemably in love with the man)—Erwin’s highly coveted gift had been something anyone of any rank, age, gender, or social standing might reasonably desire, this year, Erwin had chosen to go with—

“Diamond studs!” Petra shrieked, holding out the dainty, silk-lined jewelry box for everyone around the table to see.

Amid the “oohs” and “ahhs” that filled the room, Nile Dawk (who wasn’t participating in the game and wasn’t “officially” at the party, as he’d repeatedly told anyone he’d encountered there that night) pulled his drink-warmed face from his tankard and shot a half-annoyed, half-impressed look at Erwin.

“Just what kind o’ gift budget d’you have on this game anyway?” he slurred. “For all the bellyaching you do at budget meetings, it sure doesn’t look like your salary’s sufferin’ any.”

The smile Erwin gave him was one of perfect congeniality as he replied, “Call it an annual indulgence,” in an eerie echo of Levi’s thoughts. Turning to the rest of the party, gathered around the long banquet table they had requisitioned for the game, he added, “And they’re only a half-karat total. Not remotely as extravagant as ‘diamond earrings’ sounds, I assure you.”

On Erwin’s left, Mike sniffed loudly. “Buttering up the ladies this year, Erwin?” he asked.

“Not at all,” Erwin replied.

“But he has a point,” Hanji chimed in from further down the table. “Every woman at the table is going to be stealing those studs when their turn comes.”

“That’s still better odds than usual for nabbing the Commander’s gift!” a red-haired sergeant named Mila Ivanovich declared. “At least we won’t have to fight off the men for it this year!”

And there was the rub. Levi stared down the table at the sparkling earrings in Petra’s hand. True, he didn’t have any actual use for them (even if he were bold enough in personal style to be the kind of man who occasionally sported an earring stud or two, he didn’t even have his ears pierced), but what did that matter? The only one of Erwin’s gifts he’d ever done more with than set in a neat row on his shelf was a set of silk handkerchiefs edged with fine gold thread; it was the principle that mattered, and regardless of what utility a pair of diamond earrings would have for him, _he wanted them._ Because they were a Christmas present from Erwin.

 _Do you realize how idiotic you sound?_ a part of Levi’s mind muttered at himself in disgust. A Christmas present from Erwin? It wasn’t as though Erwin had actually picked out the present for _him_ —they were all just general presents he’d gotten for the gift exchange, with no person particularly in mind, much less him. And yes, perhaps one or two of his gifts in recent years had been so in-tune with Levi’s personal tastes that he _may_ have let himself fantasize that Erwin had noticed who was taking home his presents year after year, and had, perhaps, started selecting gifts with Levi in mind…

Levi shook his head irritably, refusing to let that idiotic train of thought continue. Whatever he’d hoped he had inferred from those past gifts, this year’s present made it clear that Erwin decidedly did _not_ have him in mind when shopping for his White Elephant Gifts. Because even if Erwin _wasn’t_ as aware of Levi’s tastes as he was sure he was, he couldn’t possibly think Levi would want or even make a bid for _this_ gift, could he?

 _So he hasn’t noticed,_ Levi thought, hating the little twinge of disappointment that flickered through his chest. What was he—a soppy teenager obsessing over a first crush? Levi cringed internally. Why couldn’t he just behave like a proper adult and either get over this childish infatuation or act on it?

Levi had imagined it—imagined lingering in Erwin’s office after an evening debriefing, leaning over his desk and staring him squarely in that perfectly chiseled face of his in the ambery lamplight and saying, “Listen, Erwin. I think I’m in love with you. Want to come out for a drink with me?”

It was almost within the realm of possibility… Levi could picture the scene to the smallest detail, could almost imagine Erwin’s thick eyebrows rising briefly before his face smoothed out into that perfect, full-lipped smile of his.

 _“I’d love that, Levi,”_ he’d say, his deep voice lingering—as it often did when he spoke softly—on the last syllable of his name. Levi imagined they’d never actually get to the pub for that drink.

It would be so simple to do—it seemed the simplest thing in the _world_ to him sometimes. And yet, he had never been able to bring himself to take that first step, say that first word. Because the truth was, he had no idea how Erwin would react. As well as Levi knew and understood him both in broad strokes and in the subtle gestures that betrayed his sometimes mercurial, always unreadable moods, he just couldn’t get a read on the man when it came to this one thing—how he felt about Levi.

And casting that particular die was so terribly irrevocable… As thoroughly as Levi, Survey Corps Captain and “Humanity’s Strongest,” had managed to detach himself from the things that gave fear power over him in battle, he had to admit that here, in the safety of the Walls and in the daily life he’d carved out with Erwin and Hanji and Mike and the Survey Corps for as long as they were granted it—there were stakes here that he _couldn’t_ detach himself from. He couldn’t bear to lose his accepted place at Erwin’s side day-to-day, the little moments of companionability and camaraderie they shared… It was funny how he could imagine accepting Erwin’s practically inevitable death in the field someday, but he couldn’t stand the thought of a living Erwin withdrawing from him in their daily interactions.

 _So what if we’ll never be lovers?_ Levi thought to himself. _I’ll live._

But he couldn’t deny that if there were some assured way of deepening his relationship with Erwin—say, if Erwin were to come up and confess his feelings to _him,_ for instance—Levi would absolutely leap at the chance. For now, though, he wasn’t brave enough to do more than try to indicate his interest in the absolute most roundabout and cowardly of ways. Which included collecting Erwin’s annual White Elephant Gift.

“Do it! Do it!” Hanji began hooting beside him, snapping Levi abruptly out of his reverie.

“What the hell are you talk—” he began, his tone surly to hide his half-moment of panic before he realized she had been shouting her encouragement to Julia Hintz, who was apparently gift-opener #4 and eyeing Petra’s diamonds. Others joined in Hanji’s egging on, and Julia finally declared she was stealing Petra’s gift despite the exaggerated puppy eyes the latter was making at her.

The game continued merrily in this vein—the men generally choosing new gifts to unwrap from the pile in the center of the table and the women demanding the surrender of the diamond studs from whomever currently held them. Though Erwin’s presents were always popular, the interest was on a whole, new level this year. A few of the men even joked about stealing the set for their wives or sweethearts.

The joking comments caused a small prickle of hope inside Levi. Whether Erwin was buying his White Elephant presents with him in mind or not, he couldn’t deny he still _wanted_ Erwin’s present. Even beyond the principle of the matter (that he should be the one to carry off Erwin’s present every year), he had a bit of a completionist compulsion within him that just wanted to have Erwin’s present this year because _not_ having it would mean breaking his neat chain of gifts.

He watched the next several gift-openers intently, hoping one of the men would steal the earrings and break the ice for him. But no one did.

When Nanaba cheerfully snatched the earrings from the dark-skinned assistant squad leader who’d been attempting to stuff them into her purse, someone declared, “That’s nine steals for the earrings! Whoever steals them next will get to keep them!”

A chill passed over Levi’s heart. Nanaba had been #14. He was #16. Each gift could only be stolen ten times maximum, and if #15 was a woman, there was a good chance she’d steal the earrings for the tenth and final time, making them hers permanently. Levi wouldn’t even have a chance to steal them…

Levi had expected the loss of choice to come as something of a relief to him; after all, laying claim to a gift clearly meant for a woman at a public gift exchange was odd enough to get tongues wagging about him. Worse yet, if Erwin was less-than-amenable to anything beyond platonic friendship with him and had happily missed or dismissed as coincidence the string of White Elephant Gifts from him that Levi had claimed in past years, Levi claiming this particular present was sure to arouse his suspicions. 

The thought suddenly spurred an even worse one—what if Erwin _had_ noticed, and this unusually gender-particular gift was meant to subtly discourage Levi from taking home his gift this year? Or, on the other hand, what if this was a test to confirm that Levi really was collecting Erwin’s presents—not for the presents themselves, but for the fact that they came from Erwin? It sounded absurdly overcomplicated, but it was just roundabout enough that it sounded exactly like something Erwin would do. Levi wanted to clutch his head to stop it spinning. What did Erwin want him to do? Should he take the gift or not?

 _Looks like I won’t have a choice, after all,_ he thought, his heart sinking as #15 turned out to be a lanky young woman named Ilse Lagner. Nanaba groaned loudly, as did Hanji behind Levi. Levi glanced briefly at her to find her fist clutching the piece of paper marked “#17.”

“So close…!” Hanji moaned.

“So, Ilse?” Gelgar called from across the table, half-draped over his three tankards. “You gonna take those diamonds home?”

Ilse’s expression gave nothing away as her eyes flickered to him and then swept around the long table and the fifty-odd Corpsmen gathered around it.

“Nah,” she said, nonchalantly snatching a bulky package wrapped in silvery paper from the pile of unopened presents. Amidst the general cries of shock and glee sounding around the table, Ilse unwrapped a beautifully carved bust of Maria (or was it Sina? Levi always got them mixed up) and Levi shored up his resolution.

This was a sign. Erwin’s gift was meant to be his.

“I’ll steal,” he said in a low but clear voice when the general hubbub died down. He turned a bland stare at Nanaba and extended one hand imperiously. “Hand over the diamonds.”

The reaction around the table was instantaneous. There were multiple confused murmurs of “What?” accompanied by squawks of surprise, moans of disappointment, and even a scandalized gasp or two. Nanaba blinked at him, dumbfounded.

“Huh? These?” she asked, holding up the dainty studs.

“Are you sure that’s what you want to steal, Captain Levi?” Petra asked from further down the table, her brows knit in confusion.

Levi could feel a slight flush creeping up his neck but willed his expression and crossed arms to remain as immobile as stone.

“Yep,” he said, letting his gaze sweep impassively down the table. He’d meant to make another short, snappy comment to shut discussion down then and there, but his eyes had suddenly caught the electric blue gaze of the Commander himself, boring directly into him. He quickly halted his intimidation sweep of the table, turning instead to stare the still-confused Nanaba down. He wagged his outstretched hand in front of her again. “Diamonds, Nanaba.”

“Even Captain Levi wants the diamonds?” a younger Corpsman named Hemmel said with a laugh. “I knew I should’ve snatched’em up for my girlfriend!”

His cheerful comment seemed to break whatever tension remained in the room, and Nanaba handed over the prize with a comically resigned air while Hanji patted her shoulder consolingly and Mike pointed out a ribbon-tied box for her to open, saying that it “smelled promising.”

Though he ensured nothing showed on his face, Levi let himself breathe an internal sigh of relief as he discreetly opened up the tiny jewelry box to examine the studs inside. The diamonds were small but beautifully cut, in delicate settings of a very yellow gold. Graceful and classy, however modest the karat. Exactly the sort of thing Erwin would buy… for a wife or lady love.

Levi quickly snapped the lid shut and glanced furtively around him, schooling away the momentary flash of hurt he knew had shown on his face at the thought. Luckily, no one around him had been looking at him. But across the table, there was that looming presence that Levi felt anywhere and everywhere at all times… Levi was almost positive those familiar blue, blue eyes had been watching him.

 _Well, what does that matter?_ he said to himself. _I knew nothing was ever gonna happen between us. And he’s never gonna actually marry a woman either, even if that’s what he’s interested in, he’s told me over and over he would never marry someone just to leave her a widow—_

He made himself halt his racing thoughts and take a deep breath. The point was that he had Erwin’s gift and the whole thing had gone over smoothly enough he wouldn’t have _too_ many people gossiping about the odd incident in the barracks tomorrow. Whether _Erwin_ had thought it odd, though…

“Wait a second!” Hanji cried next to his head at her usual, ear-splitting volume. “Julia, Gerta, Rachel, Tarja, Anette, Floor, Yasmina, and Nanaba… that was only eight steals before Levi!”

Levi had no clue what she was crowing about, but his instincts kicked into overdrive. “What are you on about, Four-Eyes?” he growled.

“You were only the _ninth_ steal on the earrings, my pint-sized friend!” Hanji said, whapping Levi’s shoulder with her surprisingly powerful pat. “In other words, those earrings are still available for one, last steal. And guess who that’s going to be!”

He stared up into her gigantic, toothy grin and suppressed the urge to punch out every one of her large, straight teeth.

“Hanji…” he gritted out.

“Hand it over, Levi,” she sang, wiggling the fingers of her outstretched hand at him.

Levi forced himself to unclench his teeth and hand the box civilly to her. Before he let himself dwell on the risk he had taken and the possible humiliation that still awaited him in order to obtain Erwin’s gift, he forced himself to adopt his most mildly irritated tone of voice to mutter, “Merry Christmas, Four-Eyes,” and immediately snatch whichever unopened present was nearest him. He continued distracting himself from Hanji’s crows of victory and the disappointment slowly starting to spread through his chest by carefully and methodically unwrapping the brown paper-wrapped package to find a sheaf of very fine, gold-edged letter-writing paper and matching envelopes tied neatly with a pale blue ribbon.

 _Not bad at all. I might actually use this,_ Levi thought, trying not to acknowledge that jeering part of his mind that said he was just trying to console himself.

The rest of the gift exchange went by in a blur of more merriment and good-natured capering. Levi accepted a tall tankard of ale from Mike at some point and allowed the numbing burn of alcohol to dampen his perceptions of the continuing party and his own feelings. When he felt the hour had grown respectably late enough, he stirred from his chair at the senior officers’ table, muttered his holiday greetings and good-nights to those nearest him, and made his way as silently and steady-footed as a cat out the entrance of the hall.

The icy night air was bracing; Levi realized he wasn’t remotely as drunk as he’d thought he was, judging by how quickly the cold was seeping into his bones. He regretted not bringing his long coat to the party as most of the other officers had, but there was nothing to be done now but hurry back to his room. He clutched his sheaf of writing paper to his torso and began walking briskly back in the direction of his barracks.

However, he’d only gone about a dozen steps down the wooden walkway before he heard a set of heavier footfalls striding swiftly down the walkway behind him. He turned just in time to feel a pair of large hands settle something warm and fluffy around his shoulders. He glanced up in surprise to find Erwin smiling down at him, the familiar lines of his face gilded silver in the moonlight.

“Erwin,” he said, unable to keep the surprise out of his expression.

“You looked a little cold,” Erwin said, a little puff of steam rising around his smiling mouth. He looked unusually cheerful, his blue eyes all but twinkling as he gazed down at Levi. Levi’s heart immediately began pounding harder.

With a slight start, he realized Erwin’s hands were still resting on his shoulders, holding the warm, fluffy something in place around him. Levi reached his free hand up quickly to grasp at the ends that met at his throat. He was surprised to find a peg-and-loop clasp there, which he deftly fastened one-handed.

“What is this?” he asked, glancing down at the garment and realizing it was a short cloak. 

“Ah, this is my White Elephant Gift,” Erwin said, a wry note slipping into his voice. “I was fifth-to-last and no one after me cared to steal this lovely, woolen women’s cloak from me.”

“This is for women?” Levi asked, his face heating. He had just been thinking how nicely the cloak fit his shoulders despite belonging to Erwin.

“My just desserts, I suppose,” Erwin said, “for bringing a present geared toward women myself.”

Levi felt himself tensing up. _Here it comes._

Out loud, he said lightly, “Oh, the earrings? Diamonds are diamonds.”

Erwin arched his eyebrows. “But surely someone with your salary isn’t in need of diamond earrings to hawk, Levi?”

Levi felt his face threatening to redden but forced himself to shrug casually. “Four-Eyes was about to pee her pants over them next to me. I stole them solely for the safety and sanitation of the rest of the party.”

He was rewarded with the warm sound of Erwin’s chuckle.

“So it was a strategic, civic-minded maneuver?” he said. Levi didn’t need to glance up at him to know he was grinning ear to ear, but he did so anyway. Seeing such a light-hearted Erwin was a rare treat. Levi could have stood there and drunk the sight of him down like honeyed wine all night.

To keep himself from staring too blatantly, Levi turned his head and shot Erwin a crooked, sidelong smile. “Being Humanity’s Strongest doesn’t stop just because we’re on holiday.”

Erwin’s toothy grin mellowed into a smaller, closed-mouthed smile, but the fondness in his eyes made his expression look all the warmer. Levi felt his breath catch in his throat. The look in Erwin’s blue eyes just then as they’d gazed unwavering into Levi’s… he could almost swear that…

“Erwin…” he began, when Erwin suddenly reached into his pocket and withdrew a small box tied with a silken red ribbon.

“It’s a shame you didn’t manage to keep my White Elephant Gift this year, Levi,” he said. Without allowing even a beat of pause for Levi’s warning alarms to set him into a panic at his words, he took Levi’s free hand in his own and pressed the ribbon-tied box into it. “But this year, I wanted to give you a real gift. Directly.”

Levi stared dumbly down at the sleek, coal-gray paper box in his hand, its lustrous red ribbon catching the moonlight.

“Well, open it,” Erwin urged, the grin audible in his voice.

Still feeling the surreality of the moment, Levi obeyed, carefully untying the red ribbon and tucking it away in his jacket pocket before lifting the lid of the gray box. Inside, on a bed of navy blue silk lay a long, gleaming pin of silver topped by a pair of tiny, pearlescent white wings picked out in delicate gold lines.

“A cravat pin?” Levi asked in surprise.

Erwin chuckled. “Considering your usual choice of neckwear, I thought it might be appropriate.”

“It’s beautiful,” Levi murmured, taking in the fine detailing on the dainty piece. “But this isn’t the Wings of Freedom, is it?”

Erwin shook his head. “I did consider getting you one with the Wings of Freedom on it, but decided against it ultimately.”

Levi glanced up at him inquisitively. “Why?”

“I… didn’t want this gift to be about the Survey Corps,” Erwin said, his gaze oddly solemn as he held Levi’s eyes. “I feel sometimes that all I ever do is press the Survey Corps and the needs of humanity on you.”

“It was my own choice, Erwin,” Levi said, matching his serious tone. “I’m here because I want to be. I fight for your cause because I believe in it.”

The warmth that lit Erwin’s eyes at that made Levi want to vow a hundred times over that he trusted and believed in him, that he would always follow him. But Erwin reached out and pressed his large hand over the pin in Levi’s hand.

“The dual white wings on the pin mean ‘hope’… and I couldn’t think of anyone who symbolizes that more than you. You bring hope to humanity, Levi… and to me as well.” He dropped his eyes from Levi’s, giving the latter a moment to recover himself as he secured the pin deftly in the middle of Levi’s crisp, white cravat. “Perfect,” he said, smiling.

Though being released from Erwin’s arresting, blue gaze momentarily had helped Levi regain a measure of composure, the proximity of the man as he’d attached the pin—of the heat radiating off his hands, so near the bare skin of Levi’s jaw—hadn’t given him as much room to recover as he would have liked. Regardless, when Erwin finished his work and raised his eyes to meet Levi’s again, Levi drew up all the courage he could muster and and made himself speak. If he didn’t broach the subject now, he knew he’d regret it. There might never be a better chance.

“I didn’t get you a gift,” he said.

Erwin gave him a coquettish smile. “Well, it isn’t my birthday.”

“But I’ve never gotten you a birthday present either,” Levi pressed.

Erwin gave a slight shrug. “Never mind that, Levi. I got you this gift because I wanted to.”

“But why?”

Erwin looked carefully into Levi’s face, and he seemed to understand the urgency in those normally still, muted gray eyes—the plea in them—and relented.

“Because, Levi,” he said, and with only a breath’s worth of hesitation, he reached out decisively to clasp Levi’s small, strong hands in his own, “you are special to me. You have been for a very long time, and I… I’d hoped that you might…” He paused, suddenly and surprisingly shy. Levi felt the start of a smile tugging the corner of his mouth as he watched those normally powerful blue eyes glance away embarrassedly.

“You don’t do this much, do you?” he asked, suddenly and utterly free of all nerves and uncertainty. He turned his hands so that they lay palm-to-palm with Erwin’s and gave them a soft squeeze. Erwin’s eyes immediately darted up to meet his again and lit in another smile.

“No, I don’t,” he said softly, drawing Levi closer. “The hope that those wings symbolize, Levi… I suppose I wanted to express another hope of mine with them.”

Levi swallowed the rising lump in his throat and grinned fully up at Erwin. He felt something like a large, sad weight lifting from his chest as he gazed into those treasured blue eyes and _knew_   he knew what lay beyond. “Just kiss me already,” he said.

“I thought you’d never ask,” Erwin managed to say before Levi’s arms wrapped around his neck and drew him eagerly down into the first of many kisses they would share.

“Happy birthday, Levi,” Erwin murmured when they finally broke apart, breathless.

“Merry Christmas, Erwin,” Levi said, and drew him down for another kiss. The night air was still icy around them, but where Erwin and Levi stood, encircled in one another’s arms, there was a warmth that could have melted away the heart of winter itself.

 

/END/

 


End file.
